I woke up a few weekends ago after a night of intense partying and realized that something needed to change. This word had been stuck in my head for a few months now and I was desperately trying to do something with it.
Moments like these serve as a reminder of the importance of having balance in your life, of investing your time and energy into things that make you happy, things that are healthy not only physically, but emotionally as well. People tend to forget about this somewhere in between working 60 hour weeks, abusing their bodies, staying in unhealthy situations because they think people will change, because they feel trapped, because they feel like this is as good as it gets.
There is a recurring theme in my life, that I tend to over extend myself to people who don't appreciate it and it lends itself to friendships that become one sided. I am not sure what quality it is within me that seeks these types of bonds or if it is with any intent at all. Maybe I feel as though I can conquer these people. Maybe I think that if I show them just enough love or attention or whatever that they will reciprocate.
So yeah, I guess what I'm saying is that I am going to try to make some better decisions in the future regarding the people and activities I invest myself into.
"I live every day like there'll never be a last one 'til they're gone and they're gone, oh but I'm too proud to beg for your attention and your friendship and your time, so you can come and get it from now on."
- Brandi Carlile
In response to this extract, I 110% agree with you and I feel the exact same way. There's really nothing to add to that cause I think you pretty much covered it all. But if I had to add just one thing it would be that all this comes with a sense of maturity. Only when someone is mature enough to stop their life for a moment, step out, and view it as an outside perspective, are they able to analyze their life or situation and apply something as abstract as balance into the equation. You never see younger people being able to do something like that. And that's not a bad thing; they just aren't ready or able to do so yet. They're the type that is very self-centered and tunnel visioned and cannot mentally visualize stepping back out of all that and seeing what's really there. It kinda goes back to my whole argument on people's innate ability to see what they want to see. That's all I have to add. You did a very good job cutting it to a tee. Bravo.
