A $3000 Vagina

Note: The original title of this post was “non-elective surgery” however, as I continued to write, “cat vagina” won me over. After asking the cat’s owner a few follow up questions, the final title “A $3000 Vagina” was born.

A few weeks ago I was sitting at my desk when the phone buzzed. It was a text message from a number that I didn’t recognize. The message indicated that its sender was in an awkward living situation and they were curious as to whether or not I currently had any properties for rent.

I sat for a moment, trying to figure out who this person was, then I asked. It was my friend, Lauren, whom I had not heard from in well over a year. We exchanged texts for about an hour. The next day she asked if I could meet her one night for a beer.

We’re sitting at the bar, chatting, when the topic of “credit card debt” came up. She said, “Well, $3000 of it is from when I got my cat a vagina...” I wasn’t really sure what to say in response to that.

It had been a while since Lauren and I had seen each other and, while she didn’t necessarily strike me as someone who would just go out and randomly modify her male cat’s reproductive organs...well, like I said, it had been a while.

“You got your cat a vagina? So, you’re telling me you now have a tranny cat.”

“Basically.”

This story could have gone to a really bad place. Fortunately, she clarified. Kadif stopped passing urine and when she took him to Penn Vet, they told her that he needed to be operated on within 24 hours or he would die.

Technically, it sounds like they just rerouted his urethra and created an opening for him to pee. This does not make for nearly as good of a story though.

I asked how he was doing since his operation. She pulled out her phone and showed me this picture. Looks like all is right in Kadif’s world.