when it rains...

it pours and when it pours you have some options...

you can wait it out 
you can grab an umbrella and muddle through it 
you can embrace it 

we all have our own ways of dealing with the storm 

i shift my focus to the sun
i think about the days spent reveling in the sunshine 

the loss i experienced this week will hurt for a long time 
what has made it easier is knowing that for 11 years we played in in the sunshine and splashed in the puddles 

i don’t mind the rain

4015 days

Eleven years to the day she came into my life, her heart stopped beating and mine broke. 


The hardest part about loving something so much is the hurt you feel when it's gone.

invincible

My cyclocross season came to a 
screeching halt (literally) a few days before the PA State CX Championships. While I am mostly healed, a few seconds in the forearm plank position provides me with a painful reminder that I am not invincible. 

I'm always amazed when I am able to rewind a situation...to watch it unfold and then find the silver lining in a cloud of gray. A few minutes after the crash my tire went flat. We pulled to the side of the road to fix it. During this time I had the opportunity to chat with someone in the group about my dog. She (a veterinarian) suggested that I take her in for a check up, so I did. The vet was concerned that Riley lost five pounds since the end of July. The results of the lab work were cause for further concern and an abdominal ultrasound has been scheduled. 

I will forever have the vision of this crazy dog running into the woods to retrieve sticks that more closely resembled small trees and carrying them all the way back to the car. She stopped running a couple years ago and gave up on stairs this past year. She's slow to get up and has recently forced me to become a magician at meal time. As time passes, there are more and more reminders that she too is not invincible.

my old dog

It's been 10 years since Riley came into my life. I used to take her to the soccer fields with a bag full of tennis balls. I'd throw one as far as I could in one direction, she'd fetch it and drop it half way back as I threw one in another direction. An hour later, she was passed out on the hallway floor, tongue hanging out of her mouth.

She has slowed down considerably over the past few years. She no longer runs for tennis balls or climbs the stairs at night.

I was walking her the other day. I remember when our walks were longer and faster. Now, we go about three blocks and she looks up at me, almost as if she forgets why we are outside. She stops to sniff everything, never in a hurry to get anywhere.

At first I found myself getting annoyed by this. Then, I paused and gave it some thought...I am thankful for my old dog for reminding me to slow down.