A $3000 Vagina

Note: The original title of this post was “non-elective surgery” however, as I continued to write, “cat vagina” won me over. After asking the cat’s owner a few follow up questions, the final title “A $3000 Vagina” was born.

A few weeks ago I was sitting at my desk when the phone buzzed. It was a text message from a number that I didn’t recognize. The message indicated that its sender was in an awkward living situation and they were curious as to whether or not I currently had any properties for rent.

I sat for a moment, trying to figure out who this person was, then I asked. It was my friend, Lauren, whom I had not heard from in well over a year. We exchanged texts for about an hour. The next day she asked if I could meet her one night for a beer.

We’re sitting at the bar, chatting, when the topic of “credit card debt” came up. She said, “Well, $3000 of it is from when I got my cat a vagina...” I wasn’t really sure what to say in response to that.

It had been a while since Lauren and I had seen each other and, while she didn’t necessarily strike me as someone who would just go out and randomly modify her male cat’s reproductive organs...well, like I said, it had been a while.

“You got your cat a vagina? So, you’re telling me you now have a tranny cat.”

“Basically.”

This story could have gone to a really bad place. Fortunately, she clarified. Kadif stopped passing urine and when she took him to Penn Vet, they told her that he needed to be operated on within 24 hours or he would die.

Technically, it sounds like they just rerouted his urethra and created an opening for him to pee. This does not make for nearly as good of a story though.

I asked how he was doing since his operation. She pulled out her phone and showed me this picture. Looks like all is right in Kadif’s world.

fore!

Thanks to my cousin, Nick, who took the pictures for this post. He graduated from eighth grade last week.


Seems like it was only yesterday when he was this little guy...

DT on the AT: New Jersey

There are 74 miles of the Appalachian Trail in New Jersey. Six and a half of these miles are located in Worthington State Forest on a section of the trail that passes by Sunfish Pond.

Last fall, I completed out and back hikes to both Sunfish Pond and Mount Tammany. I intentionally chose to hike this section again for one reason...the red dot trail, which climbs 1250 feet in about 1.5 miles to the summit of Mount Tammany. It kicked my ass! This time I returned, 16 pounds lighter and 50% leaner, ready for the challenge.

Shortly before reaching the summit of Mount Tammany, my GPS indicated that a cache was nearby. I located it without a problem; however, opening it was a different story. After several failed attempts, I re-hid the cache and moved on for the next one.


The trail continued up and up (and up), leveling off at the summit, with a very nice view of Mount Minsi.

I followed the blue trail along the ridge, which eventually led to a fire road. There was another cache just off the fire road, but it was too small to hold the geocoin. The fire road led to a turquoise trail, which wrapped around Sunfish Pond and met up with the Appalachian Trail...and my first contact with people since the start of my journey.

The while blazes of the Appalachian Trail led me back to a very crowded parking lot. After stretching and a quick change I headed home, still needing to move the geocoin to another section of the AT...guess that gives me a reason to visit Maryland and Virginia next weekend.

serendipity

Sometimes the perfect words come along at just the right time...

“The sun rose for all of us today but for me it meant more than most sunrises of my near 24 years. It meant that this year had passed and a new one had begun. It meant that the wires were undone and the scars were just scars and yes; that it’s time to move on. In this year I have seen dark places and I have seen some places flooded with light that I never knew existed. I have walked to the door of death and never felt more alive and I have learned something that is inherent whether we choose to live knowing it or not. That we are just pieces of this crazy universe, floating through space like every other piece of this crazy universe. You don’t have to push or pull or fight or win, the struggle is illusory. Sometimes or rather, all times, you just have to be...

...in all honesty, this life I’ve chosen has stranded me more times than I care to admit, but it’s that push and pull...that’s why we do this. That’s why my home is people not places and why I lean on the horizon like a dying man with one last thing to see. I am lucky. I did not choose this life it chose me. It’s strange like that. Not picking my path, but rather easing into the water and letting it carry me where it will. Yes, there will be nights where I feel like my destiny is at my fingertips and there will be nights I wish the lights were off and I could just make these sounds in the dark. Still, I will always be there, wherever there might be, staring into blackness hoping the blackness stares back at me.”

-Andrew McMahon

DT on the AT: Pennsylvania

Last week I received a reservation confirmation letter for my trip to Baxter State Park. At the end of July, I will be hiking Mt. Katahdin, which is the highest peak in Maine and the northern terminus of the Appalachian Trail.

I’ve made it a goal to hike a section of the AT in as many states as possible, before my trip to Maine. On Saturday, I hiked a section near Hamburg, PA to Pulpit Rock and The Pinnacle.

The trail was steep and rocky in many sections, but the view from the top was worth it.

When I returned to the parking lot, I fired up my Garmin Colorado and went to look for a geocache. The 300 feet of bushwhacking I did to get there wasn’t easy, but I spotted it right away. There was an Appalachian Trail Geocoin in the cache, which I grabbed to move along on my next section hike in New Jersey.

weekly recap

Sunday: Just because you’re morbidly obese doesn’t mean you can park in the spots designated for parents with small children at Wegmans.

Monday: Playing El DeBarge at the gym should be forbidden, especially on a Monday morning.

Tuesday: It’s 6pm and raining...that could only mean one thing...I am going to the Phillies game.

Wednesday: What does my father do in his car that necessitates the use of three air fresheners?

Thursday: Selecting a new pillow was one of the toughest decisions I’ve had to make in recent months.

Friday: Taking three days off from running feels more like three months.

Saturday: I get up earlier on the weekend than I do during the week.

moments

We’ve all been in situations where we feel wronged. There are times when people close to us have let us down. Relationships don’t always work out for one reason or another.

Some people may look at these instances and see them as grounds for parting ways, being angry or holding a grudge. I see them as a challenge to do just the opposite by redefining not only myself, but also the link that I have to these people.

To quote Buddha “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” I am quick to give people second (and third) chances. You can’t improve yourself without first making mistakes.

This isn’t something that I learned over night. I spent several years holding a grudge against my father for the way I saw him treat my grandmother. With age came experience and the moments in my life when I realized that there are things of greater consequence.

Most recently, it came in the form of a telephone call where the voice on the other end of the line said that something has happened and that I should come right away. Somehow, amidst all of the chaos, came a moment of clarity in which I was reminded of the things that matter the most.

These moments will be different for everyone, but without a doubt, life will keep throwing them at you as a reminder.


"Save your strength for things that you can change. Forgive the ones you can't. You gotta let 'em go."

humanity found

I go to the chiropractor a few times a month for an adjustment. Usually, the waiting room is empty and I chat with the office manager. Today, it was occupied by an older gentleman, who was in the middle of telling a story when I walked in the door. When he finished, he paused for a moment and then asked me to guess his age. Let me tell you, he looked really good for 89 years old. He said that the reason why he had no wrinkles on his face was because he never smoked, drank or doped.

He proceeded to tell a story about the way in which he taught his students about the dangers of these vices. One day he brought a drinking glass to the classroom. He placed the glass in a paper bag and with one swing of a hammer; the glass was shattered into several pieces. He emptied the contents of the bag on to the table and asked the students to put the glass back together. They all agreed that there was no way that they could restore these tiny pieces of glass into its original form.

The point of his story wasn’t exactly novel, but the way in which he told it was and that’s what I appreciated the most. All it took was one swing of the hammer (an action that took a mere second to complete) to destroy the glass.

The time spent in the waiting room was more of a monologue than a dialogue, but I didn’t mind. For a moment, it felt like he needed to be there, speaking just as much as I needed to be there, listening...and I appreciated the reminder.



"We only see two things in people, what we want to see and what they want to show us."