“Moments” I thought to myself as I turned off the radio. I drove the rest of the way in silence.
I sat with that experience, mainly because I wanted to see if my thoughts about it would change after time...nope. There will be moments when we realize that it is too late, that the opportunity has passed us.
My aunt had every chance in the world to spend time with my grandmother during the final years of her life. For some reason unbeknownst to me, she never capitalized on that opportunity. She never did anything until it was too late. It was only after my grandmother was confined to a bed in a nursing home that she started to visit her regularly.
Part of me wonders how much of this was out of genuine compassion.
Part of me wonders how much of this was out of guilt.
Be smart. Spend time with the people who love you. The experiences that you share with them are the most valuable gifts you can give them.
1 comment:
I wonder if there isn't another reason that is neither guilt nor compassion.
Perhaps people spend time with infirmed friends and relatives because they see that time as an a one-way expression and that the person they are visiting is powerless to do anything but welcome them and tolerate their visit.
Waiting until someone is confined to a bed makes the visitor feel as though they have fulfilled some social obligation. Yes, they could have spent time with them while they were alive, but that wouldn't do nearly as much for their own ego. They can say that they went to a hospital or nursing home and have others think that they did something out of kindness, when actually it was a selfish move.
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